Sunday, November 18, 2007

This is Your Brain on Drugs...

Ahhh yes, methamphetamine.

A substance you can put in your body that will make you have the sudden urge to get down on your hands and knees in the driveway of the trailer park at three o'clock in the morning and scrub all of the dirt out of the cracks then go roller blading in the parking lot of the Safeway until sunrise when the manager shows up and yells at you to get the hell outta' his parking lot then you go wandering around the shitty part of town trying to score more meth but you can't find any so you get pissed off and cross the street in the middle of the block because you just don't give a rat's ass then the cops stop you for jaywalking and find out you're under the influence so they handcuff you but you can't hold still because you're still tweeking so you squirm around in the handcuffs and the cops laugh at you because it's the funniest damned thing they've ever seen then you go to jail.

Yeah. Gimme' some of that.

4 comments:

Liz said...

That's a funny post, but it shouldn't be.

We get a lot of heroin and crack. Not so much meth... yet. Or maybe it's just not in the population I deal with (mostly the homeless guys downtown).

Front Porch Society said...

I *uckin' hate meth and what it does to people! It continually boggles my mind why anyone would ingest purely poisonous ingredients just to get high. We have an extremely high meth rate in this area of the Midwest. Pretty much every other drug call is meth related. Sad. So sad. People are just throwing away their lives for something that is literally killing them.
But it sure does make for some hilarious arrests when they are coming off that high!! lol. ;) We even had one lady pee her pants while we were cuffing her!

Officer "Smith" said...

Out here, meth is the big thing with white people. Crack is the drug of choice for the black population. Heroin is pretty evenly divided between the hardcore junkies of all races.

We have it all. Whatever you want, you can probably get it within five miles of my town.

I have found meth, crack, cocaine, weed, mushrooms, ecstasy, PCP, heroin, oxycodone, and some things I couldn't even identify. This area is a veritable dope clearinghouse.

Liz said...

My coworker had a guy smoking crack in an alley between some dumpsters. He didn't want to go quietly and in the ensuing struggle he crapped his pants. I'm glad he didn't go in my patrol car! Plastic seats or not, that's nasty.