Monday, June 30, 2008

Any Questions?

It occurred to me the other day that some of the questions I have asked people, although they sound perfectly normal to me, sound pretty outrageous to the average person. Here are a few things I have actually asked people.

Are you male or female?

Is that a gun in your waistband?

How much crack have you smoked today?

How many people are riding in the trunk?

When was the last time I handcuffed you?

What race do you consider yourself?

How long have you been a prostitute?

So you're telling me you were driving 57 miles per hour in a 25 mile per hour zone because your child has to pee?

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Then there are the questions I have asked my co-workers:

Are you on something?

Are you loaded?

Dammit! Where's my crack?

Whose shotgun is this in my trunk?

Why didn't you shoot him?

Is this your hooker?

And, last but not least... looking at a car doing well over the speed limit,

Are you gonna stop that?

13 comments:

Front Porch Society said...

lol. So true.....I guess our questions make normal people scratch their heads at times, huh? And I suppose the comments we make to eachother at the scene of a murder, suicide, DOA would never be understood either.

TheBronze said...

HA!

Berserk said...

I sometimes wonder at what point it became normal for me to reach out and feel other people's pockets.

Anonymous said...

Great questions.

Front Porch Society said...

Berserk:
Or to tell someone "spread 'em."

5150Wife said...

LOL

Reminds me of when my JD says to me "I got a DUI last night".

To a stranger that'd sound like he was on the receiving end. But, of course, I know better.

Berserk said...

When I call my wife from the jail she doesn't get mad about it.

Officer "Smith" said...

Hullo, Dad... I'm in JAIL! Booking a prisoner, of course.

Murphy's Law said...

OK, so how many times have you bet a co-worker lunch on whether or not a random driver who was about to be the subject of a traffic stop has a suspended license?

And you know you've been at it too long when you ask every motorist that you talk to if they've got anything in the car that you need to know about...even the ones that flag you down to ask for directions.

Officer "Smith" said...

Me said...

"OK, so how many times have you bet a co-worker lunch on whether or not a random driver who was about to be the subject of a traffic stop has a suspended license?"

I say this several times a day. I'll look at a car driving past and say to my partner "He's fourteen-six" (That's 14601.1VC - Driving on a suspended license).

90% of the time I'm right. I think I need to start betting lunch.

*Goddess* said...

"Is this your hooker?"

LOL! I imagine that sounds a bit odd if you're not talking to another officer;)

Liz said...

You're absolutely right, we're an odd group. Most people don't get excited about getting an OUI.

Ten 80 said...

I've become so used to asking deeply personal and invasive questions of people I've lost the polite filter for social situations. "So, what's that growth on your neck and how long have you had it?" I don't go over well at parties.