Monday, January 5, 2009

Bio-Diesel, the Malodorous Wave of the Future...

I see more and more cars, usually decrepit Mercedes Benz four doors, with large BIO-DIESEL bumper stickers on the rear.

People proudly proclaiming their independence from "Big Oil".

It's quite amazing, actually, that we have come to be able to refine motor fuel from used frying oil. I mean, where does this crap go otherwise? Let me tell you...

An underpaid employee of your favorite fast food establishment will empty the deep fryer oil into a can, and carry it outside to a large dumpster-like grease vat, which is incidentally called a "wabo", I know not why. I do, however, know it's outside for a very good reason. It reeks like nothing else.

After a week or two, the used frying oil gets dumped into a large truck from your local tallow company. You really don't want to follow these trucks too closely, because like the "wabos", they are quite foul smelling. The contents of the trucks are later rendered into tallow, to be sold to soap, candle and feed manufacturers.

Why, you are probably wondering right now, have I gone to the trouble of writing about french fry grease? Has "Smith" gone round the bend? No. I assure you there's a reason for my insanity.

The point of this whole post is this. Bio-Diesel is a wonderful alternative to the usual petroleum products. It is reasonably inexpensive to make, and it is a good start at getting away from foreign oil. But...

I hate it. That's right, I HATE BIO-DIESEL.

Why?

Because when I get behind a car burning Bio-Diesel, it's like standing next to the damned wabo behind McDonald's. I dislike very few things more than the smell of overused frying oil. And to follow a Bio-Diesel fueled car is to be subjected to a concentrated form of this odor.

Bio-Diesel exhaust smells horrible.

It's like standing next to the snack bar at the bowling alley where I used to bowl....

8 comments:

TheBronze said...

I feel 'ya. I hate bio-anything!

This "green" sh*t has gone WAY too far...

fuzzys dad said...

The Bronze said it best.

The Dispatcher and Her Officer said...

Oh please the smell alone takes me back to my first job! yep, I changed that crud!!!

Oh it so smells!!!
-Dispatcher

Berserk said...

mmm.... french fries.....

FireMidget said...

I use to clean those things....lets just say I found that shirt 3 years later. It still smelled, we left it outside in the rain for a month, it still smelled. I washed it 20 times, it still smelled.

I burned it, it smelled.

copswife said...

Sorry, but gasoline or diesel smells way worse...

antioch510 said...

Wow, an over-cooked corndog with fries right before monte carlo ...

Kelsey said...

Haha. Some students from my former college were actually the folks who came up with it. It smelled much better there, as they used only freshly-used cooking oil, rather than stuff that had been sitting around for a week. So, the cars smelled like french fries rather than rancid oil.