Tuesday, March 24, 2009

Cheers, Tears and Bitchiness...

I stopped a gal today for driving while talking on her cell phone.

As I walked up to her window, and well before I had a chance to even greet her, let alone explain the reason for the stop, she asked me like a mother talking to her kid "Did you catch me on my cell phone?"

She was quite cheery and good-natured, apologizing and telling me it was a really quick call. Her cheeriness lasted right up until I asked her for her driver's license. Then the pleading began.

"Pleeeeease don't give me a ticket. I can't afford a ticket. I just lost my job and I'm going through a divorce. I can't afford a ticket."

Yeah, and you probably can't afford the Lexus you're driving either right?

I got her docs and strode back to my car to scratch the ticket. Upon my return she was crying. "I reeeeeeally can't afford this ticket". When the crying didn't work, and she finally realized she was reeeeeeally getting a ticket, the bitchiness took over.

"I don't want to hear your explaination. Just give me the damned ticket and give me my damned license back."

Oh, really? We'll allow me to finish my careful explaination of the court process.

Finally, the five year old took over.

She stuck her fingers in her ears and said "I don't need your explainaaaaa-tiooooon. La-laaa-laaa-laaa....."

I laughed and said "You really did not just do that." She apparently didn't think it was funny, as she didn't share in my laughter.

It was truly the first time I have ever seen a driver go from bitch to child.

Then she tried to back into my patrol car as she left.

For fuck's sake lady. It's just a lousy cell phone ticket.

Sixty-five bucks because you didn't feel like pulling over to carry on your conversation.

It's really not worth the childishness.



The Bus Driver said...

you're in california? what IS the cellphone law there? i know some states have it out right banned.. but others allow hands free and still others dont care. i'd be interested to find out what the law is over there.

Leslie said...

You have got to be kidding me?!? She actually did that?!?

Firelady said...

That would be absolutely awesome to watch. I can't help but wonder if you have cameras in the cars, and if so, wouldn't you have to show the video to the other officers to prove how retarded her actions were. I know people do stupid things, but that's a new one.

*Goddess* said...

Wow, she left out the fourth stage of 'ticket grief': threatening to get you fired from that great job you have:).

Anonymous said...

How do you put up with these goofs? God Bless You and all of the men and women of the thin blue line.

Officer "Smith" said...

I wish I WAS kidding, but no. I'm not.

Our cell phone laws prohibit use of a cell phone unless it's hands free.

And no, we don't have cameras in the cars, yet. And I didn't turn my pocket recorder on for that stop.

Mad Jack said...

Let us put on our thinking caps, boys and girls!

The alleged perpetrator, female, is in a stressful situation and must respond to another person who occupies a position of authority. She begins with condescension and traverses cheerfulness, pleading, abject sorrow, loss of temper and finishes with a jejune denial that is generally reserved for television situation comedies with bad writers and worse actors. Somewhere in the tirade she emphasizes that she is in the midst of a divorce.

I do not wonder why she's getting a divorce. I wonder why some poor fool married her in the first place.

Anonymous said...

LOVE our dash cams. The videos of people like that look so fabulous in court.....um GUILTY!!!

Leslie said...

Don't ya just love those dash cams?!? lol. When we get really good ones, we all sit around the station and watch them on the PC. Makes for some great laughs!!

2 wheel terror said...

I LOVE IT! Now thats a kodak moment. I digitally record all of my traffic stops and love the hilarity from some of the drivers.