Monday, August 31, 2009

Shhhhhh... Be Vewwy Quiet... I'm Hunting Ducks...

So, I was sitting at one of my favorite duck ponds this morning, watching the commute traffic for cell phones and seat belts among other things.

In this particular spot, I sit on the far side of a shopping center driveway, as viewed by approaching traffic, and there is a big sign on the other side so you can't really see me until I've already seen you. My view into passing vehicles is perfect, as they pass within 15 to 25 feet of me, depending upon which lane they're traveling in.

As I was looking through the windshield of an approaching pickup truck, I noticed the driver had his hand up to his ear. I immediately start to think cell phone. Sometimes I'm wrong, but usually I'm right so now this fella has my attention. As he passes directly in front of me, not only can I see his pretty blue cell phone in his hand, but I can also see that he doesn't have his seat belt on.

GOTCHA!

I pulled out behind him, then pulled along the left side of the truck as we continued down the road. I was now less than ten feet from the driver, and I could CLEARLY SEE the cell phone to his ear, and the seat belt latch plate hanging from the B pillar. He happened to look left, and when he saw me he threw the phone across the truck in his haste to get it away from his ear.

DOUBLE GOTCHA!

I pulled him over and got his license. He asked me "Why did you stop me officer?"

Are you serious? You just saw me ten feet away from you, threw your phone on the floor and yanked your seat belt on and now you have the gall to ask me why I stopped you? Okay, fine. I'll play.

I explained the whole scenario, just as I have done here. Then he tells me he had his seat belt on the WHOLE TIME, and he was just checking his messages, he wasn't talking on the phone (as if that makes any difference).

At that point, I uttered one of my famous lines...

Dude, REALLY? Today is not my first day on the job.

Why do folks think that if they just deny everything, no matter how blatant, I'll just say "Oh, sorry, you're right" and cut them loose? As often as people try it, I'm beginning to wonder if it has actually worked for them in the past, or if denial is just the natural human reflex to getting stopped by the police.

I mean, REALLY???

15 comments:

Anonymous said...

Yay for good hiding spots. I had a friend who said their radar guns would emit a pitch, higher the faster the person was going. He could tell he had a good hiding spot because he could hear the pitch drop off as people slammed on their brakes when they saw him. No doubt they would then give the wide-eyed innocence a try when he stopped them, too. People are idiots; their big mistake is thinking you guys are, too.

Kimberly said...

Everytime I have been pulled over -when Mr. Po Po asks "ma'am do you know why I pulled you over?" I just nod (always for speeding). I know what is coming - and usually I get cut a break & trust me, I am very thankful when this happens.

Anonymous said...

I got me a new "duck pond" too. There is a construction site on a major roadway that is usually 2 lanes for north and 2 lanes for south bound traffic. It intersects another road (another main roadway) and there are left turn pockets that under normal circumstances would allow for a left turn. The construction has it locked down to 1 lane in each direction, no left turn permitted, as is posted with signs that state "NO LEFT TURN" and by the red circle with the line through a left turn arrow. This is done because those waiting to turn left congest the heck out of the intersection. Plain enough for most. I don't even have to hide. I just sit on the side street and I can point at them to pull over all day long, or until I run out of parking for the incoming cars. Tickets all pre-written. Its my own conveyor system. Most drivers were SHOCKED that they could not turn left even though they about ran over the signs prohibiting the turn to make the turn. I felt a little guilty at first. It was too easy. But then I pulled over the same person a second time. Hahahahaha... really? -Officer

Black Ice said...

"Are you serious? You just saw me ten feet away from you, threw your phone on the floor and yanked your seat belt on and now you have the gall to ask me why I stopped you?"

A guy I know got pulled over (speeding), and the cop asked him "Why didn't you slow down?"

My friend replied: "If you came home and found me banging your wife, would it make a difference if I suddenly jumped up and pulled my pants on? It ain't gonna change what you saw."

Looks like some people didn't get that particular memo. ;>

Alex said...

I don't think it's the natural human reflex to being stopped by the police, I think it's the trained American reflex to being denied something. Personally, I think it's in no small part due to a lack of strong authority figures up to this point.

If it worked on their parents and worked on their teachers, and if that lets them get away with whatever in stores, why wouldn't it work on police?

anon said...

I don't think denial is the 'natural human reflex", but it may well be the natural reflex of ducks.

You know, from your post title, I actually thought this would be a story about some vacation time duck hunting.

Not the sharpest blond in the tool shed, Huh?

rjmlakota said...

I have more luck getting out of a ticket by being honest then lying. If your getting pulled over...9 times out of 10 YOUR CAUGHT! Don't bother lying...

Moose

rjmlakota said...

I have more luck getting out of a ticket by being honest then lying. If your getting pulled over...9 times out of 10 YOUR CAUGHT! Don't bother lying...

Moose

Moe said...

I like when they just let it drop and pretend to be leaning their head on the hand that was just holding the phone.

Hey, look. Not only is the phone in your lap, but it's still connected and I can hear the peron saying "Hello? Are you there?"

Marco Tietz said...

I guess people think, 'hey, what do I have to loose? Worth a try.'
It's not that you are getting a higher fine for lying.

I am a fan of taking responsibility for your action, but that doesn't seem to apply to everyone. I speed, and when I get caught, I pay the ticket. period.

I always tell my colleagues when they are complaining about cops, and that they got another ticket, and that's only because he has a quote and they only doing it to get money, bla bla bla "Stop doing it! Stop speeding! Stop running red light. Start stopping at a stop sign. That will teach the cops!" :) I noticed, people don't really like to hear that though ...

Anonymous said...

I loved the duck hunting part of this post. So appropriate. I'm going to think that now, when I do a ride along.

Be vewwy quiet...

Officer "Smith" said...

I had a broad (she was most certainly not a lady) one morning who wanted to argue the quota point with me. When I told her I could write as many as I wanted, she asked how many I HAD to write.

For some reason she didn't believe me when I told her I didn't HAVE to write ANY.

Why do people assume we have a quota, instead of taking responsibility for their own mistakes?

Texas Ghostrider said...

"I don't have to write any, your just special" or "3 more and I get a big screen tv" or "quota? quota? we don't have no stinking quota, the sgt. only will give me two ticket books a day some I am trying to make them last all shift". Ok i am guilty I may have used one or two of the lines to the nice polite public. I think one day I am going to look at them as they are lying through their teeth and say your right throw their license back at them and leave and see how long it takes for the shock to wear off their face. Of course there will be a video cam somewhere....

Officer "Smith" said...

Then they'll file a personnel complaint because you "stopped them for no reason" and threw their license at them.

That's why if I've taken the time to stop a driver, they're probably getting a ticket. Especially if they argue the point with me.

Ten 80 said...

My line is, "If you don't want to tell me the truth then tell me you don't want to say anything. Don't lie to me like I'm stupid." It actually works.